God

Today, I felt God's presence. He was at Fellowship Baptist church in the third row second seat from the left. I knew He was sitting there with me. I felt His breath as He spoke to my heart and let me know all is well. He told me not to worry about it. He had everything in control. I trust Him when He tells me that. He also told me He wasn't done with this city. He has plans for it and I am just another mustard seed to plant here. Someone else will come along and water it. I will make my mark here and then I will leave. He will take it from there. But for now, I have a lot to do before that time. I can say to Rejeana, Cindy, Janna and Norman tarry on till that day comes. Mom is on a mission for Christ! I love you all and all is well with my soul!

spring

Spring is right around the corner here in Fort mac. The ugly ravens are off somewhere and the seagulls are flying around the apartment now. We took a ride to the car wash today to wash my bike and finally see some green grass poking through. The snow is almost gone. I keep telling myself to soak this up because this is the last spring I will see here. It will be great when I can get on the elevator for the last time and say so long Fort Mac. I thought about the trip home this coming December and remembered that Cindy and her family aren't going to be there. I don't know if I will like not going home to my welcoming committee. I am so used to them being there I'm not sure if I will like it without them there this time. So many emotions going through my mind is causing me to go crazy. I guess I'll cross that bridge when I get to it. Right now, I guess I'll just be alone here to finish the job at hand.

My passion

I LOVE TO SEW!!

The "E" word #2.

I worked out today on the bike. Don't know the correct term for it, but I rode for 5 miles I think. The bad part is I got my heart rate UP to 91. That is not good. I feel like I worked out good since I rode for 30 minutes, but I must've been half dead when I started! The trainer says I can get my heart rate up to 160 beats. Is that possible?? Can my heart actually work that fast? I don't think it has ever worked that fast. I guess I'll have to work harder at this "E" word. Back to it this afternoon if I have the energy when I get the kitchen torn apart and cleaned. We'll see. I may have to read instead. :)

The "E" word.

Cindy has been after me to exercise. She isn't the only one, but she has been trying to mentor me into it. I have has such an attitude about it and I think it's because I get preached at by my husband who needs to exercise too. But to me, it is more about my image. You see, I'm his Barbie doll and he loves to buy my clothes and loves it when I wear make up. So when I get pressured to exercise, it's because my image isn't what is acceptable. Having said that, I joined the gym yesterday and will start to exercise today. I love the atmosphere at this gym. It is centered around some sports and I have a heart for sports. Figure skating, ice hockey, badminton, basketball, tennis, racketball, walking track, etc is at the center. I can go upstairs and use the treadmill and watch figure skating at the same time! I hate the E word, but I will try to "run" to use the ice skating rink. I know... I'm not right. I never said I was.
The center has a very special display. It is the olympic torch of 2010! It passed through Fort Mac the day we flew home in NOvember and I really wanted to witness that one time event. Even though I didn't get to, I took a picture of the torch that has been returned for display. I hope I can download the picture to share.

Saying goodbye

I have this lump in my throat. It's the "saying goodbye" lump. It isn't infectious, or can't be cured by going to the doctor. It's something only a good cry can take care of. I am trying hard not to do that right now. I have to leave again on Tuesday and I hate leaving time and time again. One day I won't have to, but for now I will keep this lump until Tuesday. Then it will disappear for the moment. It seems that my life is filled with this knowledge of going back and forth to Canada to finish out the retirement plan. But looking back on our lives, I see that God has been filling my life with that scenario and know that He knew we were going to be doing this and wanted to prepare us. When the kids were in school, we were going back and forth to Carlinville to keep them in the school district. One day I know I will not be doing this. My kids will do okay, mom and dad will be looking forward to July come Wednesday morning.
The lump will come back Wednesday again for a time. Maybe I'll just take some aspirin and do alot of praying.

Going Home

Last night I spent the night with my mom. I always loved to go "home". To be that kid again in the comforts of my moms home. But-it isn't the same. And it isn't because dad isn't there, it's because Norm isn't there. I missed him sooo much and it was only for 12 hours! I often think about that when I think about my mom and mother in law who don't have their spouse. I was lost without mine for 12 hours, how would I feel without him for the rest of my life??? Empty like mom. I feel for her and her loneliness. I can't say what I would do in that situation. No one can unless we had been there.
I can only say God is there. She may not feel Him, sense him or hear Him speak, but I know He is and I know He cares. My mom may never get past my Dad's passing because in my heart I know she isn't leaning on the One who will help her. Not like she did in the past.
Going home is different for me and my mom is different too. When I come back home from Canada, I will have to look after her daily. She is my mom and needs us all.

Easter

Easter. The Resurrection. The day was beautiful starting out as we went to church to celebrate the resurrection of Christ. As I sit here typing my blog, I hear thunder of an approaching thunderstorm and think about how the coming of Chirst will sound. I am reminded that I have to be ready. I have to be on guard when He returns. We all do.
We had dinner with my family today. I think about them and all the changes every is going through. The one change isn't so noticeable. They are not watching or waiting for Christ's return. Some of them are not. I have alot of work to do to prepare them for that event. Question is, am I ready to be fervent about the task? Am I ready to be a warrrior for Christ and witness to them? I have been doing that but not as so intense as I should. I will try harder. I need to.

There is nothing I like better than to hang out clothes. Okay, maybe not better. But it ranks up there with mowing the lawn. Hanging clothes on a windy spring day brings fresh air into the house. I used to hang out diapers. Yes, I used cloth diapers and I loved to wash and hang them on the line. Not only am I saving energy, but I am gettting some sun as well. After today, I would say I am exhausted. I hung out three loads of clothes, racked leaves and got two truck loads of leaves, babysat and cleaned part of the house. Wow. I'm tired. Tonight I will love wrapping myself in my fresh, air dryed towel after my shower and I will be thankful for this day.